oh god, the shit my IB teachers say

Smith- French SL
Caister- Math SL
Milne- Chemistry SL
Lepage- Physics HL and TOK
Storm- History HL and English HL 
(Jackson- Biology teacher
Oakes- History teacher) 

“Without imagination and description, history is just numbers. We need to deal with it.”

Mr. Storm. To date, this is my favorite quote from him. I think it’s completely accurate, and I think it’s very brilliant and wise. I was quite impressed when he said this.

“SO I’M GOING TO DO A LITTLE DANCE WITH A LEOPARD NOW?!”

Mr. Storm’s reply to my friend’s explanation of the way Maria Alejandrina Cerventes is portrayed in Chronicle of a Death Foretold. 

“What’s a day without rain?”

Mr. Jackson’s exclamation as he hears someone mention the rain.

“That is the carrot of the end of the stick that is IB, the stick that I will perpetually beat you with.”

Storm, on the subject of university scholarships.

“That was a well thrown molar.”

Storm, in reference to the molar thrown by Skarphedin in Njal’s saga.

“Well, we know that he wouldn’t have a sort of education, ‘cause wolves don’t go to school. Which would be different if he was with fish. AHAHA!”

Mr. Lepage, on the subject of “how would one think if they were never around humans?”.

“It’s about the tolerance of G-force by humans.” 

“As apposed to G-string. That’s a completely different thing.”

Mr. Caister and Mr. Storm respectively as Caister explains the math portfolio, and Storm comes into the room to talk to the class. 

Friends: “Good luck on your oral exam Rebecca!”

Smith: “Luck? Bah. You’re going to fail. Crash and burn right here. *cue mad laugh*”

Mr. Smith, before entering the recording room for my french oral.

“There they are, looks like congratulating that guy there. Huh. They should be saying ’ HOLY SHIT MAN, THE BARRICADES!’”

Storm, in reference to the image we were studying, depicting events of the Paris Commune.

“I’d look the harp seal in his innocent eyes, and I’d just, I’D WHACK IT!”

Storm quoting one of his Latin teachers, who was talking about how he’d whack a harp seal?! I don’t even know but it was so fackin’ funny.

“Well, it seems I’ve discovered that “bitch” can be used for anything. So, next time I give you a poem I’ll say “let’s annotate that bitch!”“

Storm, after telling a story about P Diddy ordering a white truffle pasta and demanding the waiter to “shave that bitch” (the bitch being the white truffle). I CANNOT EVEN BEGIN TO TELL YOU HOW FRACKING FUNNY THIS WAS.

“And there’s one guy there,” *laughs wildly* “He’s got his arms out like this, and is smiling crazily, and his shirt says “I have ADHD” […] that guy is still my favorite.”

Storm, talking about an art piece featured in the School Board’s calendar for January.

“It’s at this time that the Americans were looking for communists under every… sofa. Choose an object and one better be checking for communists under it!”

Storm on the Cold War mentality of Americans.

“You’ve heard of this- LARP- live action roleplaying, and yet yesterday you couldn’t locate Australia on a map!”

Storm, directed at a student from the class. 

“Paper, mud, that’s not going to stand up to the elephants!” -pause- “OR THE ELEMENTS.”

Storm, talking about the poem The Wasps’ Nest, and apparently failing to be able to speak correctly. Mind you, it was still early. 

“Well, not exactly like it. I’ll try not to molest you.”

Storm, in reference to the History Boys- which is, by the way, an amazing movie. Go watch it.

“Picture ‘ideology’ as a big round thing. -draws circle in the air- And ‘ideas’ as the little things that go into the big round thing. -starts stabbing at the imaginary circle- That’s ideology.”

Stormy!

*Russian accent* “You live in country, work on farms. Get drunk. Every once in a while you kick sheep because you hate them!”

Mr. Oakes on the Russians. 

YES I REALIZE THEY ARE NEARLY ALL STORM. HE’S AWESOME OKAY.

DEAL.